Yes, back then I agreed to let my MIL bring my baby back to Penang when I saw how anxious she was when baby was rushed to A&E the other time when baby was sick. I know that she will definitely take care of my baby won't cause harm to him. I know that she loves baby as much as I love him...But but but.. as a mother... i don't really bear to leave my baby for such a long time even for a day.. let alone for a week. Being a mother herself, Why couldn't she simply understand?
Dear said that I should put myself in her shoes, that it's always their wish to bring baby back... But back in my head.. what for? Show off to relatives? I don't even bother when my relatives bring their babies for my mum to see... probably at that moment they will just comment how cute the baby is, who the baby looks like, praise and comment that how good she is taking care of the baby, how fortunate she is to have a grandson.... so those are all "feel good" factors for themselves and nothing much more. And what I fear most, teach and share those olden times how-to-take-care-of-babies techniques.
That is what I feared most. With not much education, old people do what they hear. They will feel that they are right.. coz they can simply say "so and so also like that mah" or "I also did that to my son last time mah" or "It's not like I'm trying to harm my grandson" etc etc. Indeed... I know you won't harm the baby.. just that olden days methods don't work on new generation anymore. With more facts and papers, there are a lot of "don'ts" marked for those traditional thinking. They are not as updated as us.. so they wouldnt know about all the "don'ts"...
There's so much fear and yet nothing can be done. Don't keep asking me to place myself in other shoes.. can you take some time off and ask the others to place themselves in my shoes? Or maybe stop placing each other in each others' shoes. All thinkings are individual and we can never truely understand each other... am I making sense?
I'm so distracted and not focused after I know that my MIL will be bringing my baby back.. I cant simply say no.. can I?
Sign off,
Overtly worried mummy
